Philippians 4:12

Faith in life through good and hard times

Why do haters have to hate on Social media?

I know many people that will not agree with many of the choices I make. However, they are my choices. A recent status update about taking my children to church for Halloween and not having to waste money on costumes, was taken out of context as a direct slight towards someone that is going to a costume party.
She stated it was not a waste of money if you are having fun. Ok. So let’s say I am at the slots and have spent $5000, and nothing to show for it. Well, I was having fun! Was it a waste of money? Absolutely! But I was having fun! Until I realized I spent $5000 and have nothing to show for it.
So, if I spend $100 on costumes that will be worn for 2 hours and outgrown next year, can I not assume it was a waste of money? What do we have to show for that money spent? Memories? Maybe. Could I have done something else amazing with that $100? Like for instance buy groceries. Or apply it to the balances we have with our adoption companies. Donate it to our hosting organization.
Whatever I choose to do with our money is my choice. Just like whatever you choose to spend money on is your choice. Everyone has their own definition on what is important. I don’t think Halloween is.
But if your little Vaders, Dr. Whos, Tardises, Leah’s, TMNTs are having fun and you are having fun watching them, it is not a waste for you.
My only issue is don’t use me as your outlet for the guilt you feel because we are not the friends we once were. It is not my fault that you do not agree with my decisions or what I deem important enough to spend my money on.

Leave a comment »

In Country Concerns

As you are aware, we are hosting from EE for the second time this year. The hosting program is one that takes its responsibility very seriously! The manual for hosting is very thorough and complete. Listing all the specific countries’ rules for hosting, social media posting, blogging, and public fundraising. We fill out forms for criminal background checks, have home safety inspections and have to provide references.
Apparently there are organizations here in the states that want hosting programs to stop. Many children that go through the hosting programs go on to be adopted by either the host family or a family friend. Thus giving this child in the system a home and loving family. Most of the children that participate are on the verge of aging out of their system. They will become un-adoptable at the age of 16. Unlike here in the states where you can adopt anyone at any age that you want to.
The opposition is constantly prowling and trolling sites looking for anyone new to the program who may unintentionally break one of the posting rules. They then contact the host country and inform them that we(hosts and the program) are putting the children’s lives at risk.
Seriously!! We do everything we can to protect these children before, during, and after the program. They are, in our hearts and minds, our responsibility. We fall in love with the face of a child that has a huge smile but loss and confusion in their eyes. We plan where they will sleep, what we will do, backup plans, food ideas, you name it, we think about it. It is very much like the nesting we ladies do in our last trimester, getting all the details, no matter how minute, ready. A plan!
They arrive, sometimes scared out of their wits, having flown 14+ hours for the first time ever. Some not knowing how to speak the language of the host family. But we plan for that! We have barf bags in the car for the ride home because maybe they have never ridden in a car. We hug and secretly scan for any signs of lice(which is so prevalent in institutional homes not to mention crowded airplanes with other children from other homes.) If you are hosting a teen girl you know that she will most likely have her period while she is here, another plan!
Why would anyone think we are endangering the lives of these children? Organizations that make money off them staying in institutions. Organizations that collect money on behalf of the multitude of orphans across the globe, but whose board of directors salaries rival those of Google.
We have a support group for new hosters where silly questions get answers and concerns are met with prayer and knowledge of the program. Where families can share their trials and their accomplishments while their “child” is here. Where virtual shoulders soak up tears after “our children” have to return to the country that we signed a legal document to return them to.
It is a blessing to touch the life of a child and make a POSITIVE impact on their future. There is no greater calling, parenthood. Family. Church. All children of God called to take care of each other. Some of us are just more willing to jump off the cliff into the dark waters, with Faith that He will clear the path and light the way.

Leave a comment »

Surprise!

So, I received an email today from the orphan court. Apparently, the interview team had it wrong. My “girls” are actually two girls and a boy!

So we will have total balance in the house!

Oh my gosh, we will be the Brady Bunch!

Leave a comment »

Flying High!

The countdown to meeting our D is just weeks!! We are so excited. This is just the beginning of our journey and there are lots of steps.
We have to get our home Study completed: $1500

Our Adoption Agency has about $10,000 in fees

The Country has about $10,000 in fees

Our country has about $1500 in immigration fees.

We have our first trip over seas that will be determined by their court, lasting anywhere from 2-4 WEEKS! So with Airfare, lodging, and food for 5 $10,000

Second trip: $3500

Third: $8000

While the amount is so high, I believe God will provide the necessary connections, funds, and grants that we need to bring home 3 little girls that need a family.

I have called to “walk upon the water”, trusting that God will keep us safe and provide our needs. I have that faith. My eyes are on you Lord!

Please visit my post on donating if you feel led to help us out!

Leave a comment »

Waiting

I sit on a bench and watch my younger children play at the park. Enjoying the sunshine and playing with kids that they do not even know.
I wonder what my other girls are doing right now. 6 hour time difference, so maybe sitting down to dinner. I hope that D had a good day at school and that their foster mother had time to play with the toddlers.
We are at a standstill with paperwork. Home inspection is on hold until we get word from our attorney about a traffic court issue.
I get sad and worried that we may not get things done in time. That we might lose our precious girls while the court system here takes it’s time getting around to setting a court date.
In the meantime, I am excited that D gets to spend Christmas with us.
My daughter and I have set up a shopping list on IKEA for bedroom furniture. Since we will go from having 3 children to having 6, a little rearranging is in order.
Our fundraising is going poorly and we cannot apply for grants until our home study is complete.
I know they have to make sure that kids are going to a safe home, but why do governments feel the need to charge so much for the process and paperwork.

Our donation site is live and our hosting deadlines are 10/15 and 11/15 if you feel the urge to give. Please feel free to share my link on FB or Twitter if you know anyone willing and able to donate. Thank you and God Bless you!

C

Leave a comment »

Pot Shots on Facebook

As I am preparing to welcome a foster child into my home from Eastern Europe, I see “friends” post about how the need is so great here and if you are going to foster or adopt you need to “do it in your own country.” No mention of me personally, however I am the only one in the “circle of women” that has mentioned inviting a child into my home with the plan of adopting her and her siblings in the future.
Yes there is a need here in the States, but does that mean that we are to ignore the hundreds of thousands of children worldwide that do not have families.
I don’t remember James saying that we are to take care of widows and orphans, but only if they live in your country.
Why does this bother me? These women were my friends. They obviously now spend an awful lot of time discussing me and my choices.

Am I in any way deterred from what I feel like God has called us to do? No! It just furthers my resolve. I do not need their support, although as my friends I sort of expected the “you are crazy, but we love you” support. Not the unilateral attack on my decision to adopt internationally instead of domestically.

He know the plans that He has for me. And if it is His will that I adopt domestically, he will close these doors that have opened for us and open new ones. Until then, we proceed with our uphill climb to the open door and the girls that are waiting for our family there.

Leave a comment »

I Love My Children

So, today we told our youngest son that we were planning on adopting three girls from Eastern Europe. When I had all three children in the living room, we discussed living arrangements when we have 6 children in our 4 bedroom home. They have it all worked out.

I get to build two sets of bunks for the girls rooms, upstairs. Should be interesting, but it’s not like we don’t have time. Then, I get to build a “bed/couch/room” for my oldest in our basement. While the youngest will get the oldest’s room. Boys downstairs and girls upstairs.

I am thinking that I may have to con some of my carpenter friends into helping with said building projects. And soliciting some wood from a local lumber company. Next would be getting the batting and fabric to cover the oldest’s bed frame and making very large pillows so it can be used as a couch while not being slept on.  I have a friend that may help with that one! I hope!!!

A little light on my day!

Leave a comment »

Pity Party Over

Ok, thank you all for the vent the other day.
We now return to your regularly scheduled positive(hopefully) adoption journey.

Received email from agency yesterday with approval! Yay! Now we have 40 kazillion more forms to fill out and have received our first of many invoices.

Email sent to home study case worker to schedule our first appointments. Double check what documents are needed. Best way to get them to her as she is 3 hours away.

Phone call to insurance company to verify they can get coverage while they are here before finalization.

Bank account set up to keep expenses separate. Email to accountant to go over financials and returns.

Fundraisers going on for hosting the oldest one for Christmas and for the adoption costs that are coming in already.

Meeting with our personal attorney to go over estate issues.

Love all this! Really, I do!

Bless you guys for reading and please keep our family and the girls in your prayers!!

Leave a comment »

What Do You Do When…..

So we attended the wedding of my stepdaughter this weekend. It was a beautiful, though long, service. She was glowing and I was crying happy tears as I remembered her growing up and when she began dating her now husband. Ours is a different situation. We were not there being civil and polite to the mother of the bride and her husband, our daughter was adopted by her grandparents, my in-laws, when my husband was in college. Her mother was not in the picture and while my husband was away at school, they worried that she might show up and just take her. So they did what needed to be done to protect and provide for his daughter, their granddaughter.

When her mother was pregnant with her, at 15, my husband 17, they did what my mother-in-law told them they had to do; attend adoption classes. They had been to classes, met with church officials, and everything was set to give her up for adoption.

When she was born, they both decided that they could not do it. Neither of their parents were there. They wanted nothing to do with this new blessing.

Fast forward-They are now called Mom and Dad, although she knows that my husband is her father and she calls him Daddy. She had them both walk her down the aisle.

We have been together for 18.5 years. Married for 16. We have 3 children and are looking to add to that through adoption. So, my husband has 4 children. She has 2 brothers and a sister. Legally, she has a brother and sister(her aunt and uncle) and they refer to her as their sister. Their children call her Aunt. It makes for a confusing situation when we are all together. I think that is why us being there caused my MIL so much stress.

At rehearsal, my daughter overheard my MIL tell the coordinator that we, her father and I along with her siblings, were not to sit in the “family” pews. Ok, I can deal with that. Then, when I finally get there after having to walk 6 blocks in killer heels, I find myself sitting behind my brother-in-law’s in-laws. Seriously. We rank lower than they do. But I easily forget that as the service begins and I see my lovely daughter being walked down the aisle by two of the greatest men I have known.

At the reception, my husband does not even rank an introduction. During the slideshow of pictures showing the bride and groom as they have grown up, there were very few with my husband and none with me. In fact, I was cropped out of a photo.

I love my father-in-law, I love my new family through my new son-in-law(who, might I add, had absolutely no problem introducing us as such). I am done with people who are more concerned with appearance than truth, no matter how ugly it might be. It is times like these that make it hard to follow Jesus and show love to all. Especially those that don’t deserve it.

Leave a comment »

Fundraising Links

I have multiple fundraisers going; some online and some locally.

Online parties are where you don’t have to come to my house give me any of your info, but you get something and support 2 things. You support our adoption through the proceeds that I donate from my commission and you support the companies that make it possible for me to adopt. The amount donated to our adoption does not come from the proceeds of the consultant, rather, it replaces the “hostess rewards” that these companies offer. All monies are payable to the adoption agency as per organization rules for fundraising. So, you do not have to worry about the proceeds going to buy a new 60″ Plasma!

Your Inspirations at Home

Origami Owl Party

Donate Tax Deductible for Hosting

Donate for our personal account for paying in country costs, travel and lodging

Donate To Family

Order your devotional puzzles here

Puzzles use promo code: Doran-Adopttogether

Donate Skymiles here to #9015047195

Please share this link on your Twitter or FB page and ask your friends to help support bringing three children into a loving family. Something they have never had.

Leave a comment »

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 28 other followers